Shanghai Yummy

Below is the United Airlines Purity Test from 2000 or so. At that time, I scored a 2. Now, I score 4, but only because some of the questions are out of date. Take a bonus point if you know which questions are out of date now.

Some of us fly to get from A to B. Some of us fly because we enjoy seeing the destinations. Others of us fly because we have a love affair with United Airlines. Most of us are some combination, but to see how deeply you fall into the last category I've devised the following quiz in the spirit of a good Cosmo quiz to determine your level of smitteness.
First take the test, counting how many you answer NO to.

I fly UA even if it means adding a connection/paying more.
If UA does not serve the destination, I fly UA as far as possible and connect into the UA-less city on some other "sub-standard airline."
I have the UA website bookmarked.
I have Premex's Premier website bookmarked.
I receive the domestic e-fares each week.
I receive the int'l e-fares each week.
I have an RCC membership.
I have to pay for my RCC membership myself.
On business travel I have made up fare differences out of my own pocket to stay on UA.
I have taken "unnecessary" flights to obtain/maintain status.
I have a something with a UA logo in my office.
I have something with a UA logo on my office wall.
I have a Rhapsody in Blue MP3 on my computer.
My Rhapsody in Blue MP3 automatically plays when I log into UC software, UA website and/or FT.
I know the name and face of at least five UA employees.
I have told UA employees things about UA that they did not know.
My favorite carryon has a RCC luggage identifier on it.
My favorite carryon has a 1k luggage tag on it.
My favorite carryon has 2 or more 1k luggage tags on it.
I get a feeling of calm and peace when sitting in a UA aircraft staring at the blue/gray/red carpet on the bulkhead.
I can recite the pre-flight safety announcement along with the purser.
I know the good seats in each class of service on all the planes in the UA fleet.
I tell friends/family to fly UA even when I know it will cost them more and be less convenient and they will have a "non-elite" experience.
The abbreviations RCC, 1k, Premex, ORD, DEN, IAD, LAX, SFO are major players in my lexicon.
I have a copy of Hemispheres within reach right now.
I have a paper UA schedule within reach right now.
Channel 9 turned on means happiness.
A friend/loved one has recently told me that I am "obsessed" with UA.
Friends/loved ones ask me questions about UA.
I know who Denise Harvill is.
My RCC pass/MP card is in the area in my wallet purse typically reserved for a drivers license.
No matter how poorly I've been treated by UA, the thought of ending my relationship is too frightening to consider.
I am more pleased to receive mail from UA than from my parents/children.
It pisses me off when people who do not regularly fly UA criticize the airline or pass along derogatory information.

OK, now score yourself:
0-3 NOs: Face it, you're hopelessly, helplessly in love. Some might call it an obsession but it's ok, because while UA can be a fickle lover, your adoration is not totally unrequited.
4-6 NOs: You love UA the same way you love your wife/husband. You are always there for UA and UA is (almost) always there for you.
7-10 NOs: You have a healthy crush on UA that you can more or less keep under control (or at least so you think).
10-13 NOs: You love UA like you love your dog; it's ok but if push came to shove, you would put it to sleep.
13 or more NOs: You love UA like you love your hooker/gigolo: You use it and ride it and in the end you never get out of it what you thought you would going in…and you regret all that money you spent…

PGP Signed Entry