Shanghai Yummy

Before I begin, I want to make it very clear: I didn't recently receive a traffic ticket. In fact, I've received only one traffic ticket my entire life, and that was for improperly changing lanes, resulting in a collision with another vehicle. It was more than 12 years ago. It was stupid, and I took responsibility.

Okay, with that background out of the way, here's what I want you to think about: punishing true offenders. I'm tired of people shirking responsibility in our society. Why do we not punish the people who cause collisions? No, I don't mean the slap on the wrist that they get from a slightly higher insurance rate, and I don't mean the little traffic ticket they might or might not get because of their actions. I mean, really, seriously punishing them. Something like: if you are determined to be the cause of a collision, your license is automatically suspended for one month, period. Second violators, three months. Third, a year. And after that, revoked. Sure, if the offense is particularly greivous, bump it up, but these standards should be the minimum.

You'll note that I didn't use the term "accident," but instead chose "collision." These events are not accidents. That word implies that it was a fluke; that maybe nothing could be done to avoid it. Certainly, there are true "accidents" out on the road. I'm not talking about punishing people just because they were the victims of some convergence of unfortunate circumstances. I'm talking about punishing people who have been found to be the cause of a collision.

Unfortunately the traffic laws are written for the lowest common denominator among us. If everyone was smart and responsible, we wouldn't need things like hard speed limits and "no turn on red" signs. Just be responsible. And if you screw up and cause a collision, you pay. Sure, let's keep the signs up as suggestions. But it's so stupid that someone gets a ticket for going 3 over in a 30 zone when they were realistically being a completely safe driver. That's just dumb. And then the next day, some idiot going 25 in the same place, but talking on their cell phone, cuts off another driver, causing him to slam on his brakes, and the guy behind that guy can't stop in time so they end up in a collision. Cell phone guy drives off, the blame is unjustly placed on the victim in the rear. Idiocy.

Let's remove unsafe drivers from the road. Look, I understand we've built a society that makes it really difficult, if not impossible, to not have a car (depending on where you live, yes). Since that's the case, people need to understand how important it is to be safe on the road, because if they lose their driving privileges, they'll be up a creek. I think our current laws are Pavlovian, and maybe that's how they have to be to get through to the lowest common denominator. But they're also nit-picky and petty. If we're going to have Pavlovian laws, then at least put some bite behind the punishment, and only punish things that are truly worthy of punishment.

Ideally, we could also reward good drivers. Say, instead of a car pool lane, only allowing people who haven't caused collisions to use a special lane, or lanes. But that's probably way too ambitious. Let's just start with putting our resources into getting unsafe people off the road, instead of picking on people for going 3 over in a 30.

Oh yeah, do not get me started on the point about how speeding tickets are a source of revenue for police departments. Fine. I understand that. Instead of issuing speeding tickets for the aggregate amount that they bring in, divide that amount up by the collision-causers and make them pay that amount. There, problem solved. Right people punished. Roads are safer.